The Secret Lie

One of two things usually happens on the nights I don’t even try to pretend that I’m going to be able to sleep. I either stay up and accomplish something or, more likely, I end up getting sucked into some ridiculously inane television show. Last night it was a new show premiering on one of the “discovery” stations, called The Secret Life of a Soccer Mom (SLSM). The premise of the show is to secretly whisk a stay at home Mom away from her family for a week and allow her to experience the dream career that she gave up in order to stay at home. In the pilot episode, the mom had gone to school to be a fashion designer, but decided not to pursue it in order to be home for their three daughters. At the end of the show she was offered a full time job with a design studio, and accepted.

Now, I can’t begin to tell you the many reasons why I disliked this show, but I am going to try really hard not to rant here. Instead, I’m just going to share a few observations that I made and have been pondering upon.

• Her husband’s point of view—at one point, her husband, who is a physician, was in tears because he regretted that for the past 10 years he had been unable to give her what she needed to feel fulfilled. He let her take the job because he just wanted her to be happy. But he also praised the job that she had done at raising their children and voiced concerns about what would happen when they were sick or needed her.
  
• When struggling with the big decision about accepting the job, she stated that she didn’t regret being home with their three girls, and wished that she didn’t have to choose.
  
• She did design a dress that someone famous wore at the Oscars or Emmys or something like that. I know I have a completely different set of values, but I also know that would be a big deal to some people.
  
• Two of their children were too young to understand why everyone was so excited.
  
• The creators of SLSM gave her only a matter of hours to decide about the job offer.

Perpetuating the lie that women cannot be satisfied or lead a fulfilling life while being a stay at home mom is nothing new in visual or printed media. But more than that, what struck me was the obvious solution for this family that the show failed to offer.

The mom wanted to create and design clothing. She also was torn about leaving her family for a full time job. The dad was concerned about the impact on their home and children. Why not design fabulous clothes for children? She had three beautiful girls who would probably delight in modeling for her, and would certainly appreciate the clothing far more than an actress who would wear a dress once and toss it aside. She could design her own line and work from home and have the best of both worlds. No decision to leave her family would be necessary. Of course that option was never even brought up.

And that is because true fulfillment cannot be found in a workplace, a career, a marriage, or a home. Ultimate Satisfaction can only be found in Jesus Christ and in surrender to God’s Sovereign plan. Then it doesn’t matter if we are changing diapers, or flipping burgers or juggling spreadsheets. It also doesn’t matter if our spouse and children can’t give us everything we dreamed of or expected. And it doesn’t matter what we drive, or live in, or wear. When we are satisfied with God, regardless of our circumstances, we are:

Complete in Thee! No work of mine
May take, dear Lord, the place of Thine;
Thy blood hath pardon bought for me,
And I am now complete in Thee.

Complete in Thee—each want supplied,
And no good thing to me denied;
Since Thou my portion, Lord, wilt be,
I ask no more, complete in Thee.*

But you’ll never hear that from The Learning Channel.

*taken from the hymn, Complete in Thee, by Aaron R Wolfe.